Commentary on the Gospel of
Memorial of Saint Scholastica, Virgin
One of my New Year’s resolutions was to shore up my faith life and take a more intentional approach to my faith—to become a more active participant in my relationship with Jesus. The faith part is easy for me. When I encounter something that makes me question God, I lean on my faith. I believe that I have a loving God watching over me. My God sees the big picture. The piece of my relationship with God that causes me the most struggle is the part about Trust.
Webster defines Trust as: assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something; one in which confidence is placed.
I find it challenging to completely trust that God will provide — perhaps it’s because that which is provided by God isn’t always what I want. This doesn’t mean that he isn’t providing, it simply means that I need to get used to the fact that He is in charge. I am a control freak, so that is not comfortable for me. Because of my need to control a situation, placing complete confidence in anybody is difficult for me. I’m known for being quite independent. I guess this means that I have difficulty relying on someone or something — the other way Webster defines trust.
Why do I struggle so with this concept in my faith life — especially when I have the faith in God piece down? I have faith that there is a loving God watching over me. I need to nail down the trust piece, but shouldn’t they go hand in hand?
So, I am keeping my New year’s resolution so far…and it’s a good thing, because as I ponder my trust issues with God, I came across today’s reading, it leads me to recall a few “God” moments in my life.
Today’s well-known reading of Jesus feeding a crowd of thousands with seven loaves of bread and a few fish perfectly illustrate that Jesus is indeed trustworthy. Not only did he recognize the hunger and hardship his followers were experiencing, he did something about it. He multiplied the meager supplies and provided for his followers. He satisfied their hunger, thereby giving them strength for a safe journey home.
We can take some time to reflect on our ability to completely TRUST that God will provide for me. When did God give strength, and provide nourishment for me? I’ve found that once I could identify one small example of this, it became easier for me to recognize numerous times that my God provided for me, and gave me strength. This has helped me increase my ability to trust in Him…to ‘Let Go and Let God,’ as the saying goes. I pray we all have the same results. It’s a refreshing feeling to feel cared for, strong, and nourished.